Tuesday 20 April 2010

The Compulsory Goodman Post

I wasn't going to write a review until I received the following e-mail....

From: thebloginspectors@londonblogpolice.co.uk
To: eatlovenoodles@googlemail.com
Subject: Blog Code Violation

Dear Mr Noodles,

It has come to our attention that your blog Eat Noodles Love Noodles violates several statutes of the London food blog code, in particular the absence of any reviews of Bob Bob Ricard, Goodman and Hawksmoor.

As your blog is now older than six months, you are no longer in the probation period for which we may turn a blind eye to such lapses. Moreover, any defence based on your blog concentrating on Chinese food and noodles cannot be used as you haven't got round to reviewing either Leong's Legends or Pearl Liang.

Frankly, we've always had you down as a troublemaker what with you being one of the few bloggers not to write about Pierre Koffman at Selfridges last autumn. That and the lack of coverage on burgers – save one perfunctory post – mark you out as someone we need to bring into line.

Given that we know that you've eaten at Goodman, we just cannot understand why you still haven't posted a review. You didn't really think you could get away without writing anything especially as you had dinner there with other bloggers (that Grubworm chap blew your cover with a mention in his review).

We know for example that you started with the pâté, chicken liver & foie gras w/onion jam & brioche toast and that you moaned about the lack of toast. We know that you wilfully refused the burger in favour of an equally excellent 400g USDA ribeye steak. We even know that you thought it weird that one end of the steak was medium, the other end rare and with only the middle being medium rare as requested.

Word is you liked the chips and that you dipped them in the moreish béarnaise. We also hear that you were in your own little world as you didn't pay much attention to what other people had as starters and that you spurned desserts after overdosing on steak.

We also cannot comprehend why you haven't shouted from the rooftops that you had a great night out. Notwithstanding the excellent company, we do know you were impressed by the classy elegant dining room and that you thought the service was unobtrusive and professional. Was it due to your embarrassment that the Argentine 2007 Salentein Reserve Pinot Noir from Mendoza you ordered was too sweet?

Consider this your first and final warning – you have until the end of the week to post on Goodman. Otherwise, we'll seize your blog, rename it Eat Burgers Love Burgers and forcibly insert multiple posts on why you can't get a decent burger in London.

Yours sincerely,

The Blog Inspectors

PS: Ever thought of taking photography lessons? The photos from your Casio can be a bit crap.

Goodman on Urbanspoon

If you want to know about the starters, burgers and desserts then Grubworm and Catty have reviews up. At time of writing, The London Foodie, Kavey and Uyen have yet to post but keep your eyes open as I'm sure The Blog Police are on to them.

12 comments:

  1. Mine post is written but queued behind some other stuff, been eating out (and therefore blogging) a lot lately! Will be up in a week or two! x x

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  2. Hillarious! But what about "Eat Noodles Love Burgers"?! That would appease just about everyone...

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  3. lol nice post. What I really want to know is whether Goodman's > Hawksmoor or vice versa. I had a great steak at Hawksmoor but obviously will have to try Goodman's myself.

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  4. Oh no! I'm so sorry i sic-ed the blog police on you - I'm not an informer, I'm Not

    *Quietly locks door and peers suspiciously through the closed curtains*

    I just happen to agree with what those cunning inspectors surmised about the evening though ;-)

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  5. Kavey - better be quick, the blog police are probably after you as I type.

    LF - thanks again for organising the meal at Goodman. Don't give the blog police any ideas on a name change though....

    WB - I'm pretty sure the comparison you're looking for is out there somewhere in the blogosphere although there's nothing like finding out for yourself! RE: Hawksmoor, I'm intrigued by their brunch menu that I must try at some stage.

    GW - don't worry about it. They were going to get me sooner or later. Hopefully my upcoming trip to Pearl Liang will take the heat off for a while.

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  6. Was just reading bellaphon's sighburger post. Hey, it's your blog. You can write about whatever you want to write about. People don't want to read it? They can click away. You like burgers? OK. You like dim sum? That's okay too. Trifecta, of course, would be finding a Chinese restaurant making burger dim sum.

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  7. Krista - I kind of understand where Bellaphon is coming from. On the other hand, a blog is a personal thing and it's up to the blogger what he or she wants to write. There are loads of burger posts out there but people will only read them if they have something to say, otherwise they will click away. Burger dim sum? Stranger dim sum have been created!

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  8. I have to admit, I'm a bolshie cow, I post what I feel like posting, and if people find it boring, so be it. Whilst I wouldn't be so daft as to suggest I don't write for an audience - creating a public outlet for one's writing makes that obvious - I'm not obsessed about visitor numbers so, if one or other post appeals less than another, that's all fine with me. As long as I like it!

    PS It's in the queue, still. It's coming!

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  9. Love it. There does seem to be a slight bit of repetition on blog reviews at the minute and I tend to read the first one or two about the current in place and then not read others. Yours was suitably witty though and I made it all through even though I've read my quota of Goodman reviews already.

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  10. Kavey - I hear what you're saying and you should write for yourself.

    Joshua - thanks ! I started writing a 'normal' review but I was getting bored writing it so god alone knows how anybody reading would've felt. With that in mind, I went off on a tangent.

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  11. This was ages ago and I only just read this now - fantastic fantastic post! pins you down !! Made me laugh so mcuh!!
    It was great meeting you here and even greater ever since!
    Long Live Eat Noodles Love Noodles

    LELUU xxx

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  12. Leluu - thanks, I really enjoyed writing it too!

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